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Preview: 'Now the canal was gone,' from Rat on a Ribbon (2021)



Now the canal was gone,

the Old Overflow was no more,

and

Mommy’s father and the skunky dog

were mummified tales

preserved by Mommy and Daddy

and uncles, aunts, and cousins

who would stop on the slog through their personal deserts

and expose the memories to derision,

mourning the dead

and enjoying the loss

as they relived in words

growing up

in the Great Depression,

bereft of childhood,

forsaking school

for jobs

as low in status as they were in pay:

ironing linens in a laundry,

swilling counters for a butcher,

sweeping homemade whiskey

from the oil-blotched floor

of a body shop.

They were raised in a part of the city where

American-Irish and

American-German and

American-Italian

and American-Syrian

and American Lebanese

kids

played basketball together

and went to school

and dated

and it didn’t matter that their parents

were still learning English,

and you were as likely to hear

cliffhangers about

the famous Nude Oudist

as you were about

the choirboy

who switched a friend’s brown bag lunch

with a brown lunch bag

filled with nothing but raw green beans.

After they had saved their homes

and families from what they called

the greatest economic failure of the twentieth century,

the

Irish-American,

Italian-American,

Syrian-American,

German-American,

and Lebanese-American

kids who had pranked each other

and celebrated the Nude Oudist

went to war to save the world.

And when the war was over,

they came home proud,

delighted, thrilled

that they had

gleefully sent mortars

into hilly jungles,

and heard Chopin being played on

an out-of-tune piano

at night

in a Filipino neighborhood

lit by oil lamps,

and laughed at grunts

lining up

for turns with a whore

off the Appian Way.

(“Without a word of a lie

it wasn’t me,

it was the other guys!”)

They finished high school

(when high school was still

enough education for a man)

or

went to college free of charge

on the GI Bill,

and opened new businesses,

and built new housing

and proclaimed,

as they sat in the parlor of their own

new homes,

drinking pricey liquor

beside fireplaces

raging with their owners’ zeal,

the new prime tenet

of the twentieth century,

the one that claimed

every generation does better

than the one that came before.”

Theirs was indeed better

than the one that came before them.

And that’s how it would be

for the generation after them,

and for every generation after that,

they said.

Soon the men who had launched

mortars into jungles

and witnessed whoring

on the Appian Way

and heard Chopin through the oil-lamped

night in the Philippines

were building new schools

and hiring new teachers,

and exhorting the newest generation to excel

in math and science.

One of those schools

was blocks away

from Sylvie Ann’s home.

A two-story institutional spread,

it was,

carved from post-war confidence

and orange brick,

sealed at the side streets with doors of glass and metal

too heavy for a child to heave open

without help.

The halls were tunnels of cinder block

painted yellow

and paneled here and there

with cluttered bulletin boards

framed by colorful construction-paper leaves.

Sylvie Ann thought

the place smelled like

home redecorated in winter:

a frigid sauce

of plaster, wallpaper glue, and hardware store.

The floor was made of rubbery tiles

that bounced shyly underfoot

and had the look of wispy clouds

reflected in a pond

going green with algae.

They sucked up sound,

so Sylvie Ann walked hard,

slapping them into speaking to her,

acknowledging her,

confessing to her:

We know you.”

And suddenly

there she was,

not quite five years old,

in Kindergarten,

a captive of

bulbous Venus figurines

in cotton lawn and poplin,

pendulous bosoms bouncing

as they strode to blackboards

that were really green.

They did things that Sylvie Ann

didn’t understand

but figured made sense

because they

were adults, and adults

knew everything,

while little children like her knew nothing

and needed to go to school.

So when the bloated icons forced her

to write with her right hand

instead of her left,

which she always used,

she believed them

when they told her

she had to use her right hand

because

This is a right-handed world,”

and she said nothing.

And later,

when they demanded “speed and accuracy”

from her and other pupils

struggling with math,

she

still

said nothing because

you didn’t talk back to teachers.

Talk back,

ask questions,

and they yelled at you,

and punished you

by making you stay after school.

Detention,” they called it.

Sometimes you sat in silence

with your hands folded

on your desk.

But most of the time

the teacher preached virtues called

integrity and character”

which demanded perfection through

hard work, telling the truth,

keeping your word,

not complaining.

Suffering in silence.

Controlling yourself.

One day

the littlest girl in the class

flew out of her seat

during yet another class detention

and threw her arms around a teacher

crying how sorry she was 

and she’d never be bad again

though Sylvie Ann and everybody else

knew detention wasn’t her fault

to begin with.

The teacher said nothing

to absolve the child

of the imagined guilt,

but sent her back to her desk,

and doled out more detention.

(NOTE: this was originally posted when "Rat on a Ribbon" had the working title "Biopic at Golgotha." Also, Maris Bosquet is the name I use for the poetry. It's a riff on the Latin word for "sea" and the French word for "grove,"  and it was inspired by what is now my former hometown: Ocean Grove, NJ.)

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